A couple of weeks ago we had the opportunity to visit with dear friends who live in New York City. They live in a magnificent condominium, which overlooks the East River and the Hudson River, including the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island. It is truly a world class location with views that are beyond incredible. But that is only part of the story. We know them because the husband owns a law firm that is extremely successful in New York City. But the real story here is that this man was born with no arms and only one complete leg. He faces challenges in his life the rest of us can only imagine. Yet he managed to learn how to feed himself, and he is one of the most highly skilled and dangerous trial attorneys I have ever met.  

It would be so easy to be distracted by what he can’t do, because of this tremendous disability, to ignore the simple fact that they are part of who he is. He once told me the reason he believed in God is that only God can make a hand. But he also said he learned to not only accept his disability, but on occasion, to embrace it.

I saw this in action for myself. He had been assigned to defend the New York Subway system regarding a young black man who had lost both legs, too high for prostheses. The previous court had already decided that the subway system was totally responsible, his job was to try it for damages. This young man was on the stand, when my friend waddled over to him, on his one real leg and an artificial leg, with no arms, after having taken notes with a pencil in his mouth. He asked the plaintiff to explain how difficult life was for him.

This severely injured young man received a large jury verdict, as was expected, but my friend had managed to put even this severe injury in perspective. I was the litigation manager for a large firm, and his firm already represented me in New York. I immediately made a deal with him that he would personally handle any trials for me.

I first met him when he and his then fiancé, came out to San Francisco to meet me. I was informed that he was born without arms and would attempt to greet me by shaking hands with one of his prosthetic arms. When I saw him, I ignored that advice and just hugged him. I later learned that he was shocked by that and assumed that I understood his need for human touch. I was not that sharp, but that hug started a life-long friendship that continues to this day.

I still can’t even imagine how someone would find a way to lead a happy and productive life despite this enormous handicap. But I now realize this was meant to be and in some ways his handicap made him the tremendous man he is today.

I used to have season tickets to the San Francisco Giants. Our seats were in front of the press box behind home plate. The Giants used these seats as gifts to whoever sang the national anthem, former ballplayers and celebrity guests. I meet Dave Dravecky several times when he sat behind us. One day, he brought his parents. I asked his dad how he could manage having a son who was a star athlete losing his pitching to cancer.  His dad, like Dave Dravecky, a devote Christian, said “I finally realized this was meant to happen.” He explained that Dave’s impact on other people would not have been possible if he had not suffered this horrible cancer.

Last week we saw Charlie Kirk shot and killed, in the ultimate senseless act of violence. It is hard to find any comfort in this, but I am reminded that there are people who have suffered the unthinkable whose influence was elevated far above any possible impact they could have achieved without these horrific events that had the potential to destroy them. I still can’t understand why Charlie Kirk was assassinated in such a horrible manner. It is beyond my capacity to understand. But I already see signs that he has become even more powerful in death than what was possible if this had not happened. I still wish it had not happened, and we could just turn back the clock, but I am comforted by the knowledge that our God is a better planner than any of us. Sometimes he uses the worst possible circumstances to produce the most miraculous outcomes. Our Savior was executed, in the most brutal way imaginable, yet this was used to deliver the promise of salvation to the entire world. It is not necessary for us to understand, only to trust and believe.

TDM